Always a difficult beginning

I am starting up a commission to do two small portraits of two children. The paintings will be 20×16 cm each.

Always when starting on something new there is a tremendous feeling of helplessness, a feeling that I have lost it all. I always keep telling myself to be patient, to have faith, but it hardly helps – the feeling is there. Sometimes the feeling of failure remains throughout the entire process and then after a long time I may see the value of my work. In any case, it is impossible to give up and not try one more time. The process of struggle has to be there, it has to be difficult…

Anyways, this is the subtle beginning.